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Old 10-17-2004, 02:50 PM   #155
silencer
Dungeon Master
 

Join Date: July 8, 2004
Location: California, USA
Age: 42
Posts: 68
Quote:
Besides, for a person that normally twists people's words around on the boards and throws it back at them
I should have let this warn me - I just didn't consider this humanly possible to such an extent. I wouldn't even make this response if I didn't just now consider this defending myself.

Quote:
Originally posted by Melusine:
I have absolutely no weight issues, I am not insecure about my weight - the very idea is laughable!
I never fronted that you did - just the point that all of your posts revolved around the aspect of a personal attack does somewhat suggest this depending on how you look at it; and I suppose you did look at it that way.

Quote:
Originally posted by Melusine:
The accusation that I am overblowing this issue for personal reasons is completely off the mark.
Again, I never even suggested this. Infact, it was Aelia Jusa who brought this up in the first place. You simply interpreted the text incorrectly.

Quote:
Originally posted by Melusine:
What I responded to is a negative tendency in society that allows people to say everything they want about thin or just regular slender people that would be considered offensive when said to heavy people.
They don't, and simply for the wealth of (if unfounded) support you received here isn't proof of that I don't know what is. Modelling is NOT an example here, their entire career is involved in showing off their body - an heavy-set person would also receive similar criticism from many people.

Quote:
Originally posted by Melusine:
Skinny *is* a negative term, and silencer's idea that it would be offensive to men but not to women doesn't seem at all indicative of the notion that women are hysterical when it comes to discussion of their weight.
Another twist of words - I said coming from a man, no, it's not usually unapproving. I also said being "skinny" is different depending on your sex due to physical build. A woman is naturally "slender," a man is not.

Quote:
Originally posted by Melusine:
People have been called down before for using the term "fat" on this forum. It is above all debate that there would have been a wholly different reaction if several members had told an overweight person "you look pregnant" and Gangrell would then have added "if you were you could hide it pretty damn well being so fat as you are".
I don't know how many times I have to repeat myself. Coming from a man, "skinny" is taken by on tone. "Fat" almost always has negative connotations.

skin·ny P Pronunciation Key (skn)
adj. skin·ni·er, skin·ni·est
Very thin. See Synonyms at lean2.
Of, relating to, or resembling skin.


I'm sure you can see how this can also be used in a non-negative manner - in today's society "thin" is attractive to many. Skinny does not necessarily imply that you look anarexic.

The second half of your statement blew my mind. I don't know how many times I have to say look how it was used, not what was said.

edit: and you even quoted wrong, but surely it didn't need modification to show how it was aimed as an attack .

Quote:
Originally posted by Melusine:
The audacity to accuse me of reacting "typically like a woman", the broad generalisations you make about men and women,
Sure, it was a broad generalization - but most women do get easily offended over weight issues. In similar terms, I'm sure you can say most men would get offended easily if you said they had a small penis.

Quote:
Originally posted by Melusine:
the ridiculous idea that to call a man skinny is offensive but it's ok to call a woman skinny, the assertion that all women worry about their weight but no man ever does... and THEN you tell Aelia that you live in the real world? LOL! I've known PLENTY men who worried about their weight, and many women who have extremely healthy and realistic attitudes towards their weight. The way you generalise is simply astounding. In the REAL world, men and women aren't usually black-and-white enough to make for convenient pigeonholing, no matter how disappointing that must be to you.
I don't know if it's possible to have a discussion with you not involving attacks, but here goes anyways:
1. As stated already, you took everything I said hugely out of context.
a) I said a man calling a woman skinny is not necessarily criticism, although it usually is so with other women.
b) Go back and read what I said again. I said men do not make a large issue of weight over other women, not themself.
2. As to the last remark - show me a generalization that is unwarped and prove it false. Some men like slender women, some like heavier women. Almost none make a huge issue over it. And yes I live in the real world: it might surprise you how many do live in a world who live with their own beliefs and do not care for what others term as "accepted."

In short, I hope this does not get deleted, or if it does the other posts do as well. I was misquoted well over 6 times and personally insulted over 2 for simply responding to on what my beliefs on the issue are.

[ 10-17-2004, 02:58 PM: Message edited by: silencer ]
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