Tara, if you have beaten the game before and want to have all three romances going at the same time you can download the romance override here. After all, it's not cheating until one of them catches you with the other, right?
CHEAT COMING...
If you want to START a romance with any of the four (Anomen, Aerie, Jaheira and Viconia) you need to have the cheat mode enabled. Enter the line debug mode=1 in your baldur.ini file and then use CTRL-SPACE to bring up the CLUAConsole bar. Enter the following:
CLUAConsole::SetGlobal("CharnameMatch","GLOBAL",1)
Replace Charname with the name of YOUR significant other to be!
So if you want your male protagonist to have a relationship with Anomen (though why one earth would you i wonder) it's possible, though i've never tried it.
OTOH if you want to END a relationship without navigating any dialogs replace the 1 in the console command with a 0.
Umm...might be good to have a savegame handy first though just in case.
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