[Bungleau]

Youtube has hit my kids' age groups... big time. It's almost like a version of FaceBook or something... and they're on it constantly.

So are my kids... and their accounts are set up such that I get copies of all messages and posts they receive.

We've had one round of discussions that "friends" means friends... people you actually know, or who actually know someone you actually know. Since these kids are in the 11-12 age range, that is an appropriate measure from my parental perspective.

Enough background... let me set the stage for the question.

While reviewing one wannabe friend, I discovered he's a kid in school, age 12, at most. I know his folks somewhat... not well, but we were in the same organization a couple of years ago. No problem... passes the "friends" distance test.

I also review these "friends'" pages, to see what friends *they* have. Can be enlightening... as it was this time.

Several of the comments posted by this boy on his own site were... inappropriate. Very juvenile, and sexually offensive.

I'm not prone to knee-jerk reactions, so I'm not going to say "Oh, you saw something bad there... okay, you can never look there again". In my mind, that's playing an ostrich. And contrary to some beliefs, my kids will eventually have to go out on their own into that great wild world.

Herein lies my dilemma.

If my kids posted something like that, I'd want to know so I could take advantage of the teaching moment it presents. What does this mean? Is it appropriate? Why or why not? What should we do about it? What *will* we do about it?

However, I don't know how this kid's parents feel. I suspect they're in the same boat... but I don't want my kids to end up marked as "the ones whose dad got Bobby into trouble". And let's face it... I tell his dad, his dad has a talk with Bobby, Bobby asks "How'd you find out?"... trouble in River City.

My wife asked the parent of another kid in this age group, and she suggested the military policy... don't ask, don't tell. Don't let the kids "friend" Bobby, and don't tell Bobby's parents. She's concerned about the confrontation when it's brought up.

That doesn't necessarily sit well with me, largely because I don't see it as a confrontation situation. I wouldn't tell the mom or dad how to parent their kid; that's their job. I'd just be letting them know I came across something that if they didn't know, I'd think they'd want to. What they do with and about it... that's their concern. Unless it crosses the line towards my kids, but that's a whole 'nother story, and much more clear-cut.

So... the poll. I wasn't going to poll when I started this, but it sounds like a good idea now.

What do you think? And more importantly, why?