Grendall, I think the reasoning you mentioned ("let's both use our nukes") is the reason no nation will challenge a fellow nuclear power that way. It's a staring contest that always forces both to blink.
You watch. This is merely a preliminary set-up into forcing Iran to disclose (or, alternatively, discovering) that it has the nukes. It's inevitable. Just look at a map to see the dominoe effect. India discloses, then Pakistan, then N.Korea shoots some warheads on either side of Japan. All the nations in the region are slowly letting us know they have the bomb. Iran is soon to follow. As I predicted 5 years ago.
The question is should we create the press for them or should we force them into disclosing on their own?? They must of course disclose nuclear capability - it's a respect thing in the region and the world.