Love the kobold, hate the kobold, eat the kobold, make up your mind... - Page 9

InsaneBane · 09-29-2003, 07:35 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Dragonshadow:
Join me, friends! Let us hunt the kobolds!
Errr... has anyone brought sandwhiches?

SCFC delivers to your door step.

[img]graemlins/greenbounce.gif[/img]
Insane

Dragonshadow · 09-29-2003, 08:40 AM

*mumbling* Oh fine. How many people are coming?

Sythe · 09-29-2003, 02:35 PM

Hear ye Hear ye! Lend me thou ear and I tell thee a meal thatst fill thy tummy till it pops! There is a resturant just east of Baldur's Gate. There it serves human meals! Such as Human leg good with toe nail clippings that just add more flavor. And everyones favorite small and large intestine enough to make an orc warchief belly ache. Food can be served cooked or raw though most prefer raw. We have many a appetizer for any race above and under Fae'run. We mostly deliver our goods to Mind Flayers in the Underdark and captured slaves sold to Vampire Crypts. As I have said before my doors are open to everyone! Tis better than the other [b]cheap[/] diners. We are not just a resturant we have battle pits and executions that happens every 5 hours every day.

The pits provide a good show good indeed. Adventurers who stirred troubles in ogre, goblin and kobold homes nearby are forced to fight each other to the DEATH. But those who commit the most evil crimes are executed infront of an auidence. I got the idea from the Prisoner Carnvial in Luskan. We don't like other places just chop off the head of a rouge with an axe. Nay! We boil them in hot oil then cover them in tar and then cover them in feathers. My associate Azog the goblin chief of his tribe always says "We sa dis humiliation be fo damnation!" The charasmatic goblin gave me and idea that we should start a guild. Sword Coast Head Hunters. But the advertisment read as follows.

Sword Coast Head Hunters
Have your homes be defiled by the humans? Dwarves? Elves? Or do you simpily love the sport of hunting? If so we suggest that you join the Sword Coast Head Hunters Guild (SCHH) We pay our guild members well five gold for a head. 10 for dead bodies and 20 for peasants. 40 for adventurers. 300 for adventurers and all their equipment. If you are planning to go after the big fish we strongly suggest you go to the training facility near the resturant with no name. You just need to pay our montly fee of 10 gold pieces. Feel the price is too high? Well it will be worth it you will be trained by our veteren fighters. I say join the guild! A wise gambler once said"Come in poor walk out rich!"

If you dislike the food, executions, battle pits etc you won't be able to resist this attraction. Weapons, Armor and other magical trinkets pillaged from adventurers are being SOLD cheapest prices in all of Fae'run. So cheap that it makes Adventurer Mart go red in envy!! If there is anything you need come! We also serve mages with spellbooks and other things thatd make you blink!

So I say again come my humble place and have a feast thatd fill the bellies of kings!

Firestormalpha · 09-29-2003, 03:04 PM

So basically what your saying, Sythe, is that you wish to join us in hunting kobolds? Cool!! Never would have expected such a turn from you.

P.S. that should be lend me thine ear not thou ear. Thine is possesive. Thou is the equivalent of you. There are no doubt more mistakes in your writingl, but I'm not about to waste time by picking the whole thing apart.

P.P.S. If such a location truly existed the remaining Dukes of Baldur's Gate would have razed it by now.

P.P.P.S. Be warned Sythe, 99.9% of all uphill battlers are caught in an avelanche. Survival rate of such occurances ranges in the 0% area.

[ 09-29-2003, 03:10 PM: Message edited by: Firestormalpha ]

Dragonshadow · 09-30-2003, 05:35 AM

So we're hunting everything that BREATHES now, are we?
Naaah, I'll just stick to kobolds.

InsaneBane · 09-30-2003, 06:44 AM

Let's go and flatten that restaurant. Good XP, lot of gold and good treasure are waiting. Let's go for the big fish now (we can always kill the kobolds we encounter on the road). We split the XP, the gold and the treasure (and the skulls of the orcs/ogres we meet). Deal?

[img]graemlins/greenbounce.gif[/img]
Insane

Dragonshadow · 09-30-2003, 10:30 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by InsaneBane:
Let's go and flatten that restaurant. Good XP, lot of gold and good treasure are waiting. Let's go for the big fish now (we can always kill the kobolds we encounter on the road). We split the XP, the gold and the treasure (and the skulls of the orcs/ogres we meet). Deal?

[img]graemlins/greenbounce.gif[/img]
Insane

50/50, yeah?

Sythe · 10-01-2003, 03:43 PM

Quotes Originally posted by Firestormalpha:
So basically what your saying, Sythe, is that you wish to join us in hunting kobolds? Cool!! Never would have expected such a turn from you.

Tell me where does it say that I hunt those who I was trying to protect.

P.S. that should be lend me thine ear not thou ear. Thine is possesive. Thou is the equivalent of you. There are no doubt more mistakes in your writingl, but I'm not about to waste time by picking the whole thing apart.

Sorry english teacher [img]tongue.gif[/img] And you spelled avalanche wrong.

P.P.S. If such a location truly existed the remaining Dukes of Baldur's Gate would have razed it by now.

True but I rubbed some coin in front of their greedy eyes and they looked the other way.

P.P.P.S. Be warned Sythe, 99.9% of all uphill battlers are caught in an avelanche. Survival rate of such occurances ranges in the 0% area.

I don't see snow anywhere my friend. And any mountains either. It is eastThere cannot be an avalanche in a forest.

And any adventurers are welcome to try and destroy this little buissness I set up. I doubt you will find it for it's deep in the wood of Sharp Teeth East of Baldur's Gate.(Well actually a bit more south east.)

Now do you think you can find my place in there? Even if you do you'd have to fight many orcs, goblins, ogres and of course kobolds. Did I say gnolls? I basically have an army of mercenaries but I don't have total control over them. And have no desire to ovverun the Sword Coast. I also changed my policy. I rewarded nothing if there is any harm off innocents not adventurers.

If you guys will stop making kobolds into Happy Meals then I will stop too. I rather that you kill kobolds than make them into slaves and butcher them into food.

P.S. If you cannot see the picture go here

[ 10-01-2003, 03:48 PM: Message edited by: Sythe ]

Byrd · 10-02-2003, 03:11 AM

if the adventurers cant find it how are we to go buy all the cheap stuff you promised? and how much are the kobold fingers?

Dragonshadow · 10-02-2003, 05:33 AM

Okay, no kobolds in Happy Meals.
How about McDonalds instaed?

09-29-2003, 08:40 AM	#82
Dragonshadow Quth-Maren Join Date: February 17, 2003 Location: Portsmouth Age: 35 Posts: 4,145	mumbling Oh fine. How many people are coming? __________________ aka Loc der Graf, Quillruke

09-29-2003, 02:35 PM	#83
Sythe Ra Join Date: May 19, 2002 Location: The US of A Age: 37 Posts: 2,365	Hear ye Hear ye! Lend me thou ear and I tell thee a meal thatst fill thy tummy till it pops! There is a resturant just east of Baldur's Gate. There it serves human meals! Such as Human leg good with toe nail clippings that just add more flavor. And everyones favorite small and large intestine enough to make an orc warchief belly ache. Food can be served cooked or raw though most prefer raw. We have many a appetizer for any race above and under Fae'run. We mostly deliver our goods to Mind Flayers in the Underdark and captured slaves sold to Vampire Crypts. As I have said before my doors are open to everyone! Tis better than the other [b]cheap[/] diners. We are not just a resturant we have battle pits and executions that happens every 5 hours every day. The pits provide a good show good indeed. Adventurers who stirred troubles in ogre, goblin and kobold homes nearby are forced to fight each other to the DEATH. But those who commit the most evil crimes are executed infront of an auidence. I got the idea from the Prisoner Carnvial in Luskan. We don't like other places just chop off the head of a rouge with an axe. Nay! We boil them in hot oil then cover them in tar and then cover them in feathers. My associate Azog the goblin chief of his tribe always says "We sa dis humiliation be fo damnation!" The charasmatic goblin gave me and idea that we should start a guild. Sword Coast Head Hunters. But the advertisment read as follows. Sword Coast Head Hunters Have your homes be defiled by the humans? Dwarves? Elves? Or do you simpily love the sport of hunting? If so we suggest that you join the Sword Coast Head Hunters Guild (SCHH) We pay our guild members well five gold for a head. 10 for dead bodies and 20 for peasants. 40 for adventurers. 300 for adventurers and all their equipment. If you are planning to go after the big fish we strongly suggest you go to the training facility near the resturant with no name. You just need to pay our montly fee of 10 gold pieces. Feel the price is too high? Well it will be worth it you will be trained by our veteren fighters. I say join the guild! A wise gambler once said"Come in poor walk out rich!" If you dislike the food, executions, battle pits etc you won't be able to resist this attraction. Weapons, Armor and other magical trinkets pillaged from adventurers are being SOLD cheapest prices in all of Fae'run. So cheap that it makes Adventurer Mart go red in envy!! If there is anything you need come! We also serve mages with spellbooks and other things thatd make you blink! So I say again come my humble place and have a feast thatd fill the bellies of kings! __________________ Slythe is back! Back again! Haha! <br /><br />[url]\"http://imageshack.us\" target=\"_blank\"> [img]\"http://img472.imageshack.us/img472/9928/130blood4ts.jpg\" alt=\" - \" /></a>

09-29-2003, 03:04 PM	#84
Firestormalpha Knight of the Rose Join Date: July 11, 2002 Location: Coral Springs, Fl USA Age: 41 Posts: 4,454	So basically what your saying, Sythe, is that you wish to join us in hunting kobolds? Cool!! Never would have expected such a turn from you. P.S. that should be lend me thine ear not thou ear. Thine is possesive. Thou is the equivalent of you. There are no doubt more mistakes in your writingl, but I'm not about to waste time by picking the whole thing apart. P.P.S. If such a location truly existed the remaining Dukes of Baldur's Gate would have razed it by now. P.P.P.S. Be warned Sythe, 99.9% of all uphill battlers are caught in an avelanche. Survival rate of such occurances ranges in the 0% area. [ 09-29-2003, 03:10 PM: Message edited by: Firestormalpha ] __________________ "When you start with a presupposition, it's hard to arrive at any other conclusion." "We are never to judge a philosophy by its abuse." - Augustine "If you're wondering if God has a sense of humor, consider the platypus." http://www.greaterthings.cbglades.com

09-30-2003, 05:35 AM	#85
Dragonshadow Quth-Maren Join Date: February 17, 2003 Location: Portsmouth Age: 35 Posts: 4,145	So we're hunting everything that BREATHES now, are we? Naaah, I'll just stick to kobolds. __________________ aka Loc der Graf, Quillruke

09-30-2003, 06:44 AM	#86
InsaneBane Baaz Draconian Join Date: November 5, 2002 Location: Denmark Age: 59 Posts: 724	Let's go and flatten that restaurant. Good XP, lot of gold and good treasure are waiting. Let's go for the big fish now (we can always kill the kobolds we encounter on the road). We split the XP, the gold and the treasure (and the skulls of the orcs/ogres we meet). Deal? [img]graemlins/greenbounce.gif[/img] Insane __________________ Ko-founder of the SCFC(TM) Korporation.

10-01-2003, 03:43 PM	#88
Sythe Ra Join Date: May 19, 2002 Location: The US of A Age: 37 Posts: 2,365	Quotes Originally posted by Firestormalpha: So basically what your saying, Sythe, is that you wish to join us in hunting kobolds? Cool!! Never would have expected such a turn from you. Tell me where does it say that I hunt those who I was trying to protect. P.S. that should be lend me thine ear not thou ear. Thine is possesive. Thou is the equivalent of you. There are no doubt more mistakes in your writingl, but I'm not about to waste time by picking the whole thing apart. Sorry english teacher [img]tongue.gif[/img] And you spelled avalanche wrong. P.P.S. If such a location truly existed the remaining Dukes of Baldur's Gate would have razed it by now. True but I rubbed some coin in front of their greedy eyes and they looked the other way. P.P.P.S. Be warned Sythe, 99.9% of all uphill battlers are caught in an avelanche. Survival rate of such occurances ranges in the 0% area. I don't see snow anywhere my friend. And any mountains either. It is eastThere cannot be an avalanche in a forest. And any adventurers are welcome to try and destroy this little buissness I set up. I doubt you will find it for it's deep in the wood of Sharp Teeth East of Baldur's Gate.(Well actually a bit more south east.) Now do you think you can find my place in there? Even if you do you'd have to fight many orcs, goblins, ogres and of course kobolds. Did I say gnolls? I basically have an army of mercenaries but I don't have total control over them. And have no desire to ovverun the Sword Coast. I also changed my policy. I rewarded nothing if there is any harm off innocents not adventurers. If you guys will stop making kobolds into Happy Meals then I will stop too. I rather that you kill kobolds than make them into slaves and butcher them into food. P.S. If you cannot see the picture go here [ 10-01-2003, 03:48 PM: Message edited by: Sythe ] __________________ Slythe is back! Back again! Haha! <br /><br />[url]\"http://imageshack.us\" target=\"_blank\"> [img]\"http://img472.imageshack.us/img472/9928/130blood4ts.jpg\" alt=\" - \" /></a>

10-02-2003, 03:11 AM	#89
Byrd Dungeon Master Join Date: January 9, 2003 Location: Oregon Age: 41 Posts: 67	if the adventurers cant find it how are we to go buy all the cheap stuff you promised? and how much are the kobold fingers? __________________ ~The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.~<br /> <img border=\"0\" alt=\"[monster13]\" title=\"\" src=\"graemlins/monster13.gif\" />

10-02-2003, 05:33 AM	#90
Dragonshadow Quth-Maren Join Date: February 17, 2003 Location: Portsmouth Age: 35 Posts: 4,145	Okay, no kobolds in Happy Meals. How about McDonalds instaed? __________________ aka Loc der Graf, Quillruke

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